Zack lay awake, feeling numb, and in a state of shock from his dream. The angel's revelation was a tremendous blow. He had only recently come to accept the angel as a true messenger sent by God. It had taken a lot for him to overcome his skeptical nature enough to trust the source.

The dreams so far, had been intriguing to Zack, but this one caught him completely off guard. Was this to be his path? Was it a moral path to take? Did his desire for offspring justify what the angel was suggesting, that he father a child with his niece Mary? Now that God's plan had been revealed to him in no uncertain terms, did he even have a choice?

He rolled over and let his gaze settle on young Mary, still asleep. She was like a daughter to him, he thought. He had known her from the instant she came into the world. He was loath to do anything that might harm her. She was an innocent, unblemished soul, held close to her families' protective bosom. If he chose to go through with the plan, it would have a profound impact on her life, and on their relationship.

Of all the things that could happen to her in this life, this bizarre plan could be cataclysmic in its effects.

Zack's mind raced with questions. Had he misunderstand the exchanges with the angel? Was the arrangement made plain to him before? Had he been told but purposely not heard? He thought about the dreams that had been coming almost nightly -- that led up to this point. He felt far removed from the others, by himself in a dangerous landscape with a dangerous path ahead of him.

Yet the angel's directive was not without precedent. As a Rabbi, Zack had listened for many hours to the confessions of members from his congregation concerning fidelity, tortured stories of men who had slept with their wives' sisters, or their mothers, or even their own daughters, desperate to produce an heir. In the past, he had attributed these to lust, not progeny. He unwillingly recalled some of the wild tales he'd been told.

Now that he was face-to-face with his own story, he understood how the yearning for a child could cause a man to take extreme measures. He just wasn't sure how he felt about his own niece being the vessel, especially because of the deep feelings he had for young Mary. If, as directed, he kept his role a secret, how was that supposed to relieve his situation if he could not acknowledge his own child?

Zack was a questioner by nature. He believed in God, and he hoped that God was merciful -- unlike men, who were brutal to each other. If it was will of the Lord, it should be his will, Zack thought. Even so, the angel's direction required a huge leap of faith. What the angel proposed would be abhorrent to Liz or Ann, or even Josh, who, regardless of scripture, enjoyed playing the passive role with his servant Eran.

As he considered the course before him, Zack became more anxious. He reached into his robe and pulled out the flask. He took a gulp of the brew, hoping it would calm him down. He got up from his bedroll and walked toward the caves, looking for a place to be alone with his thoughts and apprehensions.

It was still dark. Most were still asleep and unaware of his stirring. He walked quickly to the caves, climbing back up to the ledge, to the cave where he had gone before.

Once inside, Zack struck a piece of flint to light a small lamp he'd brought along. The tiny flame offered little light so it was still quite dark. The cave was damp and slippery inside. Zack walked carefully to the back of the cave and found an elevated spot about the height of a table. Dried flax leaves had been piled upon it, perhaps to create a kind of bed for earlier visitors. He was not the first to appreciate this hidden realm.

He was alone inside. He placed the small lamp nearby and lay back on the bed of leaves. There was not enough light to see beyond an arms length in any direction.

The potion was working, having its effect. He felt his mind and body calming as it had before. Zack felt quite relaxed. He thought of the dream and realized that this was the place pointed to by the angel's companion. Remote, secluded, and soundproof, it was the perfect place to perform the act of conception. Perfect for lovers or for criminals, and he felt like both, this secret space seemed to exist outside of time like the unknowable place they called God's home, the Ain.

An epiphany came to Zack. This place, revealed to him by the angel, existed outside the real world. It manifested to support God's plan. He was filled with a kind of excitement, as though the Father was truly connecting with him.

Zack took another swig of the potion. He liked the direction that the drug was taking his mind. It was as if the world was encouraging him to act, despite any apprehension.

When Zack arrived back at the encampment it was deserted except for Eran. The others had have gone off to enjoy the springs, he supposed. Eran was lying atop a huge boulder enjoying the sun. He was naked except for a cloth covering his manhood, but his sword lay close by. He was their dedicated guardian, while the others were off enjoying the springs.

Oscar had probably gone with the women to the caves, to provide them with protection. They could not afford to leave the camp or the women unattended.

"I'm back now, Zack called up to Eran. If you want to go enjoy the springs, I can stand watch. I can't remember being here when there were so few people. Perhaps people are on the road back to their homes after the holiday. Our timing couldn't be better."

Eran sat upright, startled by Zack's sudden appearance. He quickly pulled on his robe, and slid down the rock face of the boulder.

"I was wondering if I should go search for you, Rabbi. Did you go far?" Eran asked. "I asked the others but they were unconcerned by your absence. Your wife said 'not to worry' so I did not," His tone was apologetic in case Zack felt disregarded.

"It wasn't far at all, physically," Zack's speech slowed by the potion. His voice was wistful, dreamy. "There are so many caves to explore here, and not all of them are easy to reach," he said.

"There is a concealed cave up above," Eran offered. "One with a stone bed in the back perfect for napping or ..." Eran caught himself before saying anything more. He knew he was treading on shaky ground with Zack. He couldn't be certain, but he suspected it was Zack who had come upon him and Josh when they were having sex in the shed. Nothing had been said, but it would be dangerous to even hint at his and Josh's secret life.

"You know about that cave? Zack asked, surprised and intrigued. "I thought it was my discovery. It's quite a special place really, so remote, so private."

"The Master and I have been there before -- a few times actually," Eran said, "on our way to Damascus on business. This place is an oasis for travelers headed in either direction."

Deciding not to press the point, Zack went to his bedroll and lay down, covering his brow, to protect it from the sun.

"Go enjoy yourself," Zack yawned motioning toward the caves. His eyes closed half way, and then completely.

Eran decided to stay right where he was. Despite Zack's insistence, whoever was going to protect their encampment should be awake, he thought. He climbed back onto the large bolder that was his perch and resuming his watch but not removing his robe. He scanned the area around the perimeter. As he lay on the warm rock, he was aroused remembering the pleasures he and Josh had shared in their apparently not so secret cave. He was looking forward to his solo trip back to Nazareth, to Josh.

(End of Chapter 13)